Eureka! 

The final push for Death Fish and Life Fruit.

Arcturus read a gardening book to Emily at bedtime. He tried to explain what he was attempting with his resurrection, by way of a picture book. Emily was like, "So this plant will finally turn you into a man?" and Arcturus flipped through the book about an anthropomorphic pack of seeds and was like, "Uhhhhh,... sure. I don't really... Hey, wait, was that an insult?"

"Ok. And what do you do next, Dad?... Water it?... Ohhhhh."

After she fell asleep, he went out to the lake. Now that his fishing skills were top notch, he was capable of sacking the legendary death fish. There's only one place in town you can catch it and there's a "No Fishing" sign there. I don't think you can't get arrested for fishing though.

Sirens in the distance. Arcturus looks around nervously.

Step one complete.

Back at home, Arcturus walked right up to Betty and held the fish in her face. "Remember when you kept complaining about all the hours I spent watching that fishing show? Hmmm?" She rolled her eyes. "Honey, if you told me this fish was going to make you come back to life, I still wouldn't think it was worth watching several hours of frikkin 'Fishing Fracas'." And she was right. Every episode was quite literally the same.

The next morning was all about the garden.

To grow a life fruit, you have to search the world for the right seed to plant. This requires zooming in to the ground as far as you can and actually scrolling through the entire world, looking for a seed that, in game, is nearly the size of an actual seed. It's very annoying. Once you find a seed, you have to collect it and plant it. The seeds are labeled things like "special" and "unique" so you don't even know what they'll grow into until you plant them and they mature.

After many searches and random plantings, Arcturus found a life fruit. He also found a money tree. Next time someone tells Arcturus that money doesn't grow on trees, he'll laugh. Because that person is an idiot now.

The life fruit plant is near the chimney. 

The money tree is that big ball of trash on a tree trunk.

The Easter Bunny gnome sits and waits, patiently...

It's arrived. "That was certainly interesting," the gnome thinks.

Step two complete.

Now with the two ingredients necessary, Arcturus had to learn how to bake the food that would make him a real boy again. He took a trip to the bookstore and bought the recipe for Ambrosia. It was about $30 to buy that single recipe. It wasn't a sheet of paper though, as you would expect, but a full book.

Not one to follow a recipe while cooking, Arcturus set out to memorize the entire thing before starting. He could handle no distractions. Betty was happy for him, at least.

"Fish and fruit,... fish and fruit..." *closes book*
"Fish... and... damnit, Betty, you distracted me!"

After memorizing the recipe, he sat back and all this kind of garbage flew around his head. Words and numbers, I guess. He was enlightened. A new man. A renaissance man.

Pictured: Arcturus plugging into the matrix or something.

Arcturus hit the kitchen after all the haze around his head dissipated. He threw the recipe in the trash because he didn't need that anymore and took the death fish and life fruit out of the fridge. He got right to work, chopping everything up and filling a gigantic pan. Then, he put the giant pan in the oven and after a few minutes, pulled a little plate out with a small portion of food on it. What happened in that oven?

It's garnished and everything. This oven is special.

"This tastes like garbage, Betty."

After eating copius amounts of "Ambrosia", Arcturus was like, "Alright, enough of that. I feel like becoming a solid now." So, he stood up and *poof*, he was a solid. Betty's immediate reaction was to put a fairy spell on him to make him cold. She had been waiting a year to play that trick on this guy and it truly did not disappoint.

Emily walked into the room and was like, "Finally. Now I don't have to tell my friends at school that my dad haunts my house." Arcturus laughed, "That was cool... Alright, that was cool..."

"Emily, do you know who I am?"... "Ay-yi-yi."

"I'm glad you're back. That was annoying, to say the least."

Arcturus took a shower. He smelled like a corpse.